Sagittarius - Feb. 27, 2010

The position of the planets today impels you to think twice about coming to a major decision concerning a close relationship. At this point you may not have all the necessary facts, even though you may think you know the reason for wanting things to be different. Don't fool yourself, as it would be better to take your attention off the subject, and allow the answer to emerge.


stop fooling myself. the answer is still the five letter word.
failure is the mother of success. bluff people one. failure means failure forever. for me

Sagittarius - Feb. 22, 2010
An emotional issue with a family member could have you wanting to run away and hide, Sagittarius. Don't fight the urge. This may be just what you need in order to clear your mind regarding the problem and heal your wounded psyche before you face this person again. You might also receive some rather disconcerting revelations about yourself and old traumas that you’ve long since forgotten. Don't fight these either. Simply release them.

emotional issue with family members today? nope. but old traumas? probably yes. because those memories are haunting me. and hunting me down like crazy. and its driving me nuts. i might need some anti-depressant soon. or maybe i can try to get myself hooked on anxiolytics or sleeping pills.

if anyone would want me to describe my life now. i would say ITS A MESS. totally. i am tired. i need a break. i want to go mars. i am suffering from decision-making-phobia and reality-facing-phobia. i just want to run away from everything. EVERYTHING.

and its because everything isnt the same as before anymore. we arent the same anymore. and its hard to go back to how we used to be. and its my problem because i cant seem to forget and let go. my brain is controlling my brain and i cant seem to do anything about it. and why do i hold on when its making me so miserable. weird brain. the human mind is oh so fascinating!

money and love. which one would you choose? i might choose the latter. but since its beyond my reach, maybe i'll take the former. but all i wish for is ______. i dunno. but i SWEAR im gonna makes lots of money. maybe i'll try buying some love. WHATEVER LA.

perhaps its better to be friends than lovers. because friends are forever. a couple might not. but not necessary. i think this world is tooooo confusing. too complicated for a small fry like me.

and from now on, i am not going to think about the past bad experiences. maybe everything would be better. or am i thinking too much?

and one last thing. u are super super idiotically irritating. WTF?! i know u are superbly fantastically amazing SMART. but can u stoppppppppp annoying me? argh. maybe it is my fault for being ULTRA DUMB. but hey, who wants to be dumb? who wants to be looked down upon by others? be more sensitive alright? tmd

If i tell you i badly need someone to talk to, would you be there for me?




Haiz. I need my pc... :(

aww dearest prince ___ , can u please take me to mars and we'll live there happily ever after?

Happy Chinese New Year :D

and

Happy Valentine's Day <3

Oh dear, why am i in such a bad mood?

:(

My mind is in a whirl now. But there is one thing i am very certain about!

my mind is so confused now :((


where is my pc?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?

I really wish...




I have faith in you, and me, and us :)

我的心, 很痛很痛...

you've forgotten i'll do ANYTHING for you.
you've forgotten the fond memories we've shared
you've forgotten to be there when i needed you most
you've forgotten to console me when i'm upset
you've forgotten to ask about me
you've forgotten i even exist

and i've forgotten i ____ you

the simplest thing i ever have to do to make me upset and emo for so long is to click on something that i shouldnt have. i just did. and i am trying my best not to think about it. but suprisingly 我已经没有感觉了. probably because i am used to it. i should stop dwelling on the past and move on. but its just too hard. because everytime i close my eyes, your face just appeared in my mind. irritating.

its so hard to hear those words coming from your mouth again. i know i never will. a part of me wants to forget everything completely, another part of me cant bear to. make up my mind. :(