i am absoultely not ok.

like i have said for the n'th time. nothing is going on well. yes i should be thankful that i am alive and kicking, but seriously, this kind of life sucks to the max

i really dunno what to do. i really hope nothing bad will happen. i already duno what to do in the pharmacy. i am so sick and tired of everything. i need some private time to do some quiet thinking. i cant help feeling emo in the pharmacy. i know it will never ever be the same. but i really feel very very very sad. i dunno what to do. its like there is no one to help anymore. dont remind me that it happened. because apparently my wish did not come true. i have to stop whining and grow up. stat.


anyways. great news:

i was superbly disappointed in myself today. i had EUT in the afternoon at 2.30pm. so i had to go lunch at 1.30 sharp. which means i have to finish topping up my wards by 1.30 and it is uncontrollable. because you never know when is the order coming down, and when is it going to be packed and check. well there are about a million people in the pharmacy, but still need time and resources right? fine.

and perhaps, they think too highly of this little junior staff here. because i have to top up ward 63 today. congratulations to me. and the great thing here?

1) i have not topped up W63 before (i only went one with the big jiejies during my attachment hald a year ago)
2) there are a total of 7 stations in W63 so 7 bags 7 keys 7 trolleys
3) and i have to bring 2 students with me

VIOLA.

not trying to find excuses for myself. but its kinda stress because its not like the usual top ups where i can go and explore myself and slowly come back. no way, because i have got to rush back for my course and i dun want to be a bad example for the students. (well i am, and i apologise for not being a good teacher and setting a bad example)

so guess what?

everything was going on smoothly, not much fridge items, i can find the keys, although the nurses thinks i am irritating. and i think i am too. until an error popped up.

1 tab of 15mg mirtazepine appeared in the 8 tabs bag of 30mg mirtazepine.

fine. near miss queen back in action.

then there was a shortage if tablets

then there was alot of extra capsules

great x 100 times

so i went back to the pharmacy at 2.20pm. i wanted to amend all the errors by myself and then go up myself. (which i usually do). but today i really cant. so cheryl loo helped me. i didnt want to trouble the iou team la. thanks loo loo!

so no lunch lor. kang qi was kind enough to call me if i am alright with my ward. but i dont want to cause any more trouble. and she helped me buy polar puff for me so that i could munch. thanks alot!!

i am too xun la.

cheryl loo told me buddy is expert in W63. wah seh. i even sms her that i would not throw her face. apparently this buddy too toufu alr la. sorry buddy, your buddy too cui. 我太丢脸了. so sorry. very sad. the moment i reached the pcy, i told cheryl loo that buddy is so going to be disappointed in me. =( and whats worse, i keyed in the timing in front of lao da. omg. i am going to remain a junior staff forever. die.


ok tay rui yi wake up your idea and stop complaining. xun jiu xun la. =.=